Retreat with St. Paul of the Cross- Day 7


     On November 29,1720 Pau Daneo wrote: “….. I engaged in prayer and went to holy Communion with dryness, and during prayer I was distracted. I want to explain what happens to me in distractions….. the soul remains more or less in peace with God, despite the fact that it is disturbed by the thoughts which trouble me. ….. However, through the knowledge that God gives me, and I am aware of it, I know that the soul always remains fixed in God in His peace but it rests there more unmoved and withdrawn. …..    “In my opinion, it is like an infant with its mouth at its mother’s breast as it takes its milk. Although it struggles with its hands and feet, fidgets, turns its head and so forth, it continues all the time to draw nourishment because it never takes its mouth away from its mother’s breast. Certainly it would do much better for itself if it stayed quiet instead of acting as I have just described; nevertheless that milk goes down its throat because it never takes its mouth away from its mother’s breast. So it is with the soul. The will is the mouth which never fails to imbibe the milk of holy Love although the faculties, memory and understanding, wander away from it. Certainly it [the soul] gains more assistance if they [the faculties] remain quiet and united with it.”  

   Orlando’s entry: The gift of constant prayer. I tried the same prayer of elevation as yesterday without anywhere near the same luminous result. But, thanks to St Paolo,  I reveled I’m my distractions, I even laughed. I imagined My Heavenly Papa holding me in His arms feeding me with His grace and love no matter how clumsy my attempts were at prayer. I had a happy day, in spite of all its complications, knowing that my God was with me, feeding me with that holy joy.      

Berta’s entry: Dear Jesus, it’s great to realize that I’m not the only one that gets distracted in prayer. St. Paul of the Cross wrote, at 26 years of age in his diary, that he would become distracted in prayer, but even through these distractions he knew his soul was at peace with God. That is something I have learned to understand about myself. No matter how distracted I am  or how busy I am with chores or worries I seem to know that God is not far away from me. Sometimes in the middle of something I will stop and ask for God’s blessing and advice. Other times I ask for Him to take over and lead me where He thinks I should go. I believe that all this is the work of my soul connecting to the Divine. A touch of the Divine (my soul) is connecting or reaching out to my Creator, my Father, my Teacher, my Love. It’s a Love affair! It is hard work! It’s sacrifice! It’s salvation! It’s eternity!      Lord Jesus, without You I can no longer feel alive! Thank You for feeding me like a baby. Your grace is what keeps me going. Your mercy, compassion, and love strengthen  and change my soul’s understanding. May I continue to grow in You and through You, my Lord God! My Triune God, I love You !!!

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